KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT
A local bachelor is struggling to update his wardrobe today, unable to commit to buying a large basket of clothes online in a bid to carry out a personal makeover.
Inspired by a recent dry spell in the dating department, The Advocate understands local bachelor Alex Hurley (29) has decided to take his credit card for a spin in a bid to restock his wardrobe with the latest trends men’s fashion.
After spending many hours scrolling through his Instagram feed for style direction and reading an article titled ‘7 ways to dress like Pete Davidson’, Mr Hurley is thought to be stuck at a familiar crossroads again, unable to decide what type of fashion suits her best. painfully regular frame.
“Too much linen and I look like a preppy bitch who can’t change a tire, but too much ripped denim and faded logos and I feel like I’m skipping 10th grade to smoke a cone at the skatepark.”
“I can’t find the right balance!”
With six items of drastically different colors and fabrics sitting in slow motion in his trolley, Mr. Hurley stared wistfully out the window, ruminating on what a potential future girlfriend would think of his outfit of choice.
“Do girls still like chinos?
“I know flannel is out, but what if it was a surfy brand like Barney Cools?”
“Are Converse back or did they sadly die with the emergence of Hillsong musos?”
Scanning through image after image of bevel-jawed male models, Mr Hurley complained to our reporter that menswear in 2022 had simply become too fragmented.
“All the hipsters in the French Quarter are wearing these stone blue baggy jeans and tucking in their shirts again, but every time I try on this outfit, I look like the president of a Rotary club cooking a barbecue at a school party. “
“Damn, I’m just gonna buy a new Broncos hat and some underwear and I’m done with that!”